Last Wednesday, February 17, was Ash Wednesday, the first day of the season of Lent. Last Wednesday I did something I have never, ever done before. Are you ready? I sucked on a Wint-o-green Life Saver all the way to the end because it was Lent. Can you even imagine the connection? Hang with me, and let me tell you about it.
I began the day without even a clue as to what kind of discipline I might undertake during Lent. I was wondering why the Lord had not given me some direction yet. Sitting in the 7:30 a.m. service in the chapel, as Don was offering the meditation, it came to me. “Impatience, Jim, impatience. Give up impatience!” I wanted to say “I don’t have enough patience to give up impatience.” As I thought about it, I realized that was the reason for giving up impatience. And, truly, it is a sacrifice for me.
So here’s the Life Saver story. Normally I throw one of those Life Savers in my mouth and immediately chew on it, and it’s gone in five seconds. It’s as if the object is to get rid of it as quickly as possible rather than savor the Saver. So Wednesday I said, “Jim, see if you can possibly enjoy it to the end.” I’ll have to admit I did gum the last remnant of it, but I did not chew it! That was my test. I found out that I can be patient.
The next time you see me at the grocery store or in traffic, don’t be surprised if you see me in the longest line as I test myself. Don’t be surprised, though, if you see me in the shortest line either if I am really in a hurry.
Since Wednesday I found myself (somewhat) enjoying waiting in line for 45 minutes at the car wash. When the guy jumped in front of me in the line at Panera the other morning, I felt sorry for him because of his impatience. (Maybe next Lent I’ll give up self-righteousness. Just one thing at a time right now, though.) I am learning to use the waiting time to reflect and meditate. If I can do this patience thing, I think I’ll be a better person. I think I might enjoy life even more than I already do.
Had I given up something tangible, it wouldn’t be such a struggle. I don’t think I have ever failed in a discipline like that during Lent except once when I didn’t realize that the covering on the almonds was white chocolate after I had eaten the whole bag. This will be tougher. It will be easier to forget. It will be easy to be in a hurry. It will be tough to avoid the temptations of impatience.
Come Easter, I hope and pray that I won’t just all of a sudden give up the struggle. I hope that Lent will simply be an opportunity to begin to change something about me on an ongoing basis that will make me a little easier to be around. I want to use the waiting time in conversation with the Lord or more fully enjoy the company of those around me.
Some of my “friends” made fun of me a couple of years ago because I gave up Cheetos. They scorned me and said, “You mean Jesus died on the cross and you’re giving up Cheetos?!” Well, dear clergy friends, here you go! See what you think about this one! Maybe, just maybe, this one can change me – at least for a season. I pray so!
- Jim
